Have You Seen My Keys??

Today I learned that if you quit smoking and start using The Patch and you think it's not working enough that it is NOT a good idea to make a belt out of The Patch and stick them across your stomach.

Life is full of good decisions and bad decisions. Quitting smoking is a good decision because you're not smoking. Quitting smoking is a bad decision because you can't, like smoke. And stuff.

Today my brother said I could move to Philadelphia and live with him, but I told him he smells like feet and I don't live with feet smelling people.

Today I paid for my flapjacks at McDonald's at the first window and drove off before stopping at the second window to pick up my flapjacks. I had to go back in and explain it to the employees because I really wanted those flapjacks.

Then they laughed at me. They laughed long and they laughed hard.

But I have my flapjacks, so who's laughing now?

Today I should be working, but instead I am typing this.

Wouldn't it be cool if there were packs of wild hamsters running the streets?

2005-09-28 at 12:42 p.m.