Fight for your right to par-ty

People are supposed to start showing up for the surprise party in about an hour. I don't really remember why I thought this was a good idea. People have cancelled or never even told me if they were coming, so who knows if I bought way too much food or not enough. Bastards.

Also? I may not have ever mentioned this, but I am very so not good in social situations. I am really, really, really bad at small talk.

Really bad, did you get that?

I will have to, in theory, be here with these people I really don't know while the guest of honor doesn't show up for another half hour.

It is going to be quiet and weird and akward and . . .

Optimistic, aren't I?

I think I will go have a drink now.

This was probably the wrong week to quit taking paxil. At the time, it seemed better to be depressed and skinny than fat and mildy amused.

Now I am thinking fat doesn't sound to bad beause at right now I am still fat, but filled with anxiety and twitchiness.

Right, need to go get that drink.

Or three or four.

2006-01-14 at 2:44 p.m.