Dix!e C@rter, Classy

I know, I don't update for three months, and then I update twice in one day. I lack consistency, I am aware.

I moved my trashcan away from my desk because I threw a breakfast burrito in there this morning and it was smelling a bit death stinkish. I keep throwing trash on the ground where my trash can used to be though, and then I’ll look at it on the floor and think, hmmm, that can’t be right. Goes back to my theory about being unable to learn new things.

I hate my burrito smelling desk.

I feel sorry for the new guy here at work, goes by the name of Patrick. Last Friday, he invited Ryan to go over to the bar across the street after work with him and some of his friends. So then Ryan runs over to my desk and starts trying to whisper something, which I never can understand when people try whispering to me through clenched teeth what the heck they are saying, so I usually just say yes or no because the person gets so frustrated with me. Ryan skipped that step and hissed at me to come over to his desk. I trot right over and he whispers, “do you think Patrick is, you know, that way?” Hmmm, which way could that be? Nice? Friendly? Incontinent? He said it was just weird that he invited him, a guy, to go out to a bar, but didn’t invite me or some other female type. Naturally his conclusion was that Patrick must be gay. Not that maybe, oh I don’t know, he was just looking for friends to hang out with and it is easier to ask guys to go hang out than girls, right? And also, please, like anyone would hit on Ryan, pshhhhhhh.That would be crazy. Ryan then says that he is going to stay away from Patrick from now on. I told him good idea, because if Patrick was gay, he might try and convert him, so he should watch his back. I also told him to be extra careful in the bathroom, that’s usually where the gay germs are most prevalent. The insanity train has pulled out of the station. It’s a train with one passenger, no one else will be allowed onboard.

I hate my job.

Three of my co-workers have been loitering next to my desk discussing accents for the past 20 minutes. The consensus is that they don’t like Southern accents, they sound too “hick”. Except Dix!e Carter, she sounds elegant apparently. Now they are saying things like “y’all” and laughing hysterically. One of the people in this discussion is Banessa, who starts every sentence with “oh my god!” and uses the word "like" 37 times per minute. I wish they would go away so I could get back to playing Tetris. The other two people involved in this think tank are Walter, he of the porn star mustache and pants way too high fame, and Patrick, the new potential gay. I'm not feeling so sorry for him anymore.

I hate my co-workers.

2005-02-16 at 9:26 p.m.