Bionic Leg Woman

I have to go buy vacuum bags tonight. I have gone through three vacuum bags in a week. I just bought this new (expensive) wool rug and it is a shedder. As if I didn't have enough problems with my cat's hair . . . I guess I felt I needed a challenge. I have heard it can take a couple of months for the shedding to stop - of the rug, not the cat. The cat is a lifelong kind of situation that makes me wish I had invested in lint roller stock.

Anyhow! 65 degrees in January in Denver? Should totally be a day off with pay. I'm just saying.

Ok, so I work for the feder@l g0vernment (your tax dollars, hard at work right here!), but I am a contractor. Lots of people here are contractors. We get red badges. The actual g0vernment employees get green badges. All of the red badge people want desperately to be green badges (the green badges totally look down on us). It's all very weird.

So . . . the contract that I am on (and several others) was lost and now??? Now I shall be jobless (along with some others) as of MARCH 4TH! Actually I want to be upset or worried, but I am so not. I wonder if I can collect unemployment? Perhaps food stamps too? Just for a few months, you know? I mean hell, I have been paying into that fund for about 20 years and once I am unemployed I will need a GIANT wheel of government cheese to sustain myself.

I have sent out about 25 resumes over the past week and have heard NOTHING. Still with the not being worried yet though. Maybe that will come in later, like I will be driving down the freeway and break out into a cold sweat because I will be unemployed? I hope not because I might drive into a ravine where I am forced to amputate my own leg (that will be stuck under the drive shaft) to pull myself up a rocky embankment to rescue.

Totally going to be more work to find a new job with only one leg.

I would love some breadsticks from Pizza Hut right about now. They are so fattening, but I just love them with the red sauce, lots and lots of it.

Ok, random!

Happy Thursday and if you don't hear back from me soon, it probably means I am being fitted for a prosthetic leg.

2009-01-08 at 3:04 p.m.