Asphalt Taquito

In Kansas City, 7-11ís are pretty gross. The weird smell, the weird guys, the weird everything about it. Quik Trips in KC are usually nice Ė not to mention they have the best tasting fountain diet coke machine in the world. No really, the best. I am a connoisseur after all. Normally I prefer the bottled diet coke. If desperate, I will purchase the canned variety, but will pour it into an empty diet coke bottle (I always have one of these). Not quite the same taste, but passable.

Flip over to Florida and there are no Quik Trips, but there are 7-11ís. Guess what? Theyíre not so bad here. They donít smell, theyíre well lit, and the weird guys are usually not around until 3 or 4 in the morning. Their diet coke fountain machine, not so great, but you canít have it all.

They also have taquitos. Mmmm, taquitos. My favorite would be the jalapeno taquito, which is cream cheese, jalapenos, fried in a corn tortilla and left to rotate under a heat lamp until I purchase it. Probably has another ingredient too Ė maybe pure deliciousness. I seem to eat one daily if not more. I also have gained about 10 lbs, but Iím not sure if there is a connection between the increased taquito consumption and the weight gain. Itís really hard to say in these types of situations. More investigation is needed. Will update with the results when I am ready to be airlifted out of my home.

Saturday before work I stopped to purchase one. On the way into my car, it slid out of the little paper bag onto the asphalt of the parking lot. I looked around, picked it up, and went on my way. Iím not proud of it, ok? The parking lot wasnít wet and it only touched the ground for all of two seconds, tops. Shoooot. I removed the bottom outer tortilla layer where it landed so really it wasnít as gross as it sounds. Ok, yes it was, but damn, it was gooooooood. Mmmm, spicy and cheesy. Youíre jealous, I can tell.

You know what, itís not like it fell out in a KC 7-11 parking lot, those are full of urine, used crack ho condoms and other gross stuff. So pblttttttt.

Speaking of KC, I am flying home this Saturday. Iím kind of nervous. See hereís the thing: I havenít flown anywhere in almost four years. The last time that I flew anywhere, to be exact, was September 11th. Yes, that September 11th. Obviously I wasnít on one of THE planes, but . . . . what could have been. My flight was diverted to Memphis, Tennessee Ė I had originally been on my way to Colorado for a wedding that weekend. Being on a plane, no one really knew what was going on until we got to the airport and every television was showing slow motion pictures of the towers falling. Very weird feeling that I canít adequately put into words.

I wasnít that upset back then Ė for myself I mean. I was in shock over what was happening all over the world, but not thinking about how I had just been on a plane. Truthfully I never even really thought about it until I purchased my ticket home last week and now, well . . . I KNOW that flying is safer than most other things, like driving or deep sea fishing or eating parking lot taquitos, I know this. Iím still a little nervous though. Ok, a lot.

I think I need another taquito.

2005-06-27 at 10:19 a.m.