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Butt Pains in the Tired Room

I am having a problem with my car. Thatís shocking, right? Itís not the usual car-type of problem. Itís gas. Yes, thatís right, gas. No, itís not the fact that it takes $27.84 to fill the little gas tank Ė although believe me, that is a problem, just a different one. No, the problem I am having is the gas tank, specifically the location of the gas tank. Itís on the passenger side of the car. Why is this a problem? Let me break it down. At least one out of every five times (proven statistic) I stop to fill up the tank ($27.84 approximately), I pull the stupid car to the stupid wrong side of the gas pump. Why? I. Donít. Know. The car I drove before this, the now classic 1992 F0rd Temp0 (with optional, decorative luggage rack) also had the gas tank on the passenger side. I decided to research this by going through old pictures, all the way back to a simpler time, 1990. The year I drove a 1978 T0yota C0rolla and weighed 200 lbs (me, not the Toy0ta). Do you know what was in this one picture? Aside from my fat ass taking up most of the frame? Thatís right, a car with a gas tank on the driverís side. Aha! What does all of this mean? My theory is that I have the ability to learn things once, and only once. After that, forget it, itís over, imprinted on my brain forever and ever. Fascinating, right? Itís like Iím a highly functioning (ok, fine, moderately functioning) jackass destined to drive really crappy cars. Cool.

I donít like my job, did you know that?

Other than that, not too much has been going on. I took a spinning class last Friday, or as I like to call it Anal Violation by a Stationary Bike class. Seriously. I felt like I had been ass raped by a bike seat after that 90 minute class. Not in a good way either. Is there a good way? I donít know, but this wasnít it. Apparently you get used to the feeling after a while, or lose feeling, like you develop some sort of ass callous. Hmmm. Sign me up for another class please!

Random e-mail message of the day from one of my genius co-workers:

-----Original Message-----
From: Random Co-Worker
Sent: Tuesday, February 15, 2005 9:48 AM
To: Toast
Subject: Tired Class room

Toast,

Can you please find out if the tired class room/auditorium in either Tower IV or III are available on April 27th or 28th. We are planning a meeting and weíd like to reserve a tired room for that.

Thanks,

Genius

Think maybe she means the tiered classroom? Iím unsure since she spelled it TIRED three times. Iíd love to work in that room, since Iím feeling a little tired right now. Can I book some time in there as well, please?



2005-02-15 at 11:44 p.m.